I started to cry at work today. I was reading the news on wikipedia; specifically, one about the current Israel-Lebanon Conflict. The article was tremendously heart wrenching. My sadness was became deeper when I read an article in the New York Times, which discusses how people on both sides of the conflict are using the internet to share their horrifying experiences with the world; people from each side expressing their anger and fear.

I cried because it's so overwhelming to me. Both sides have suffered so much loss.

Regarding most things I have an opinion, but for once I am without one. As Americans how can we form judgment when there is no way we can understand what it's like to live in that region of the world and to be those people each day?

My former husband and I separated on the day that the US first bombed Iraq. I remember feeling so much pain over the seperation and eventual divorce; however, I also remember feeling put in my place when I saw pictures of families fleeing Baghdad with military vehicles and tanks in the background. My pain was put into perspective and for awhile I mourned more for the Iraqis than myself.

Today, I felt something very similar. I've been feeling overwhelmed by my job and other things and it was all put into perspective today when I saw pictures of bodies of women and children being pulled from a destroyed building in Qana.

I've lost my faith. I realized that in a bathroom stale at a movie theater. I've lost my faith and I have no idea where it's gone.

I thought Lady in the Water by M. Night Shyamalan was one of the most beautiful movies I've seen in a long time. I felt moved in a way. A fantasy story based on a fairy tale showed me that I lost my faith.

After watching the movie, I read some of the reviews and they aren't very good, but it doesn't surprise me. So many people can't hear the message of faith any longer. We get so bogged down in the daily and we stop believing in the divine, in the magical.

Watching several people come together to fight for a common cause, especially one so unbelievable, allowed me have a glimpse at faith once again.

And to think...I almost went to see Clerks II

I love Joel. The last several days he has had dinner ready when I came home. While that may not seem huge, it truely is. It makes the evening go much smoother and allows me to relax when I get home instead of continuing to work. Additionally, the kitchen has been clean and laundry has been folded.

Thanks Sweetie!

2546

As of today 2546 American soldiers have been killed in Iraq. When this war first began, soldiers were dying at about 30 a year (this was in the first couple of months) and the neo-cons actually had the gall to say that we (the US) could be in Iraq for 10 years before we reached the same number of people who had died in 9/11. Well, so much for that projection. Sometimes I want to cry because my brother is in the Air Force and his bosses (Rumsfield and Bush) are greedy and nuts!

This article is a must read for those of us who value Oregon as a liberal state. It scares the hell out of me that we could become a red state. If neo-cons gain control of this state, I am abandoning ship and heading back to my home state of WA, which is definitely not at risk of becoming conservative. Please pass on this article to other liberals in Oregon.

Interesting article on divorce rates in liberal versus conservative states.